Kim Says

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February 14th, 2014 · No Comments

There are two appliances in my home that I am not allowed to touch; the alarm clock and the vacuum cleaner. I’m not sure the actual problem, but I must exhibit some kind of ElectroMagnetic Pulse (EMP) around these two particular items because if I touch it, it breaks.

The vacuum cleaning is now delegated to the Hubby since I refuse to spend one more dime on yet another damn vacuum cleaner, ever. The alarm clock stays on Hubby’s side of the bed, well past my ability to reach… or throw… depending upon the hour.

Today was like any other day. Hubby wakes me up by 8 a.m., I turn on the TV and listen to the news while I get ready, and then I’m out the door by 9:15.  

I’m sitting on the edge of the bed putting my socks and shoes on when the news program hostess says the following program will be “up next”. Wait a minute! The following program starts at 10 a.m., not 9 a.m. My clock says it’s only 9 am. I’m looking at it right this minute! Was there a program change? A scheduling mistake? A wormhole?


He acknowledges that yes, my clock does say it is 9 a.m. but every other clock in the state says it’s 10 a.m. I arrived at work today at 10:22. I have no idea what happened to that clock. I swear I did not touch it. Musta just been my ElectroMagnetic Personality (EMP).

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Tags: Biographical

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