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The saddest thing I’ve ever heard…

March 12th, 2010 · No Comments

Sari was going through and cleaning out her closets yesterday. She said she was more than ready to pass along all of her maternity wear to others in need. She also said that now, as a mother of two, she needed to purge all of her hoochie mama clothes and find a deserving Hooter’s Gal to pass them along to.  Anything that stops above the bellybutton and anything that creeps above the butt cheek line is off to party on elsewhere.  

Tears began to well up in my eyes. I was heartbroken! 

If, at 26, Sari is feeling old enough to put away her “young things” then what in the hell would Stacy and Clinton think of MY CLOSET?  Damnit! 

I still wear the black lace boots that I bought during the height of original 80’s Madonna. I still wear turquoise-crocodile-leather pumps with 4 inch blazing silver heels! I could never part with my double-wrap belt with the dangling stars. And yes, I do still currently own several pair of leg warmers and I will never give up my slouch sox. (Thanks to Sari and her former Hooter’s attire, slouch sox are still available! Thank god). 

I don’t want to give up my old things. I like them too much. But that’s the point isn’t it? When our grandchildren start to point and laugh at our “mom” jeans and feathered hair? Sari can’t show up to the next PTA meeting wearing her pink slut dress and Candies platforms. Well, she could, but she’d just make all the other mother’s jealous and the dad’s would drool all over themselves. 

I guess now is as good a time as any. Who wants to go shopping with me?

As Wilma and Betty used to say, “CHARGE IT!”

Tags: Rants & Raves

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