Kim Says

…laughing all the way

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August 4th, 2011 · No Comments

Recently, the kids took me and Hubby to try the Lazy
River. It’s where we rent those big, black inner tubes and float down the
Cahaba River down Montevallo way. It had been a glorious, suffocatingly hot
Tuesday when we all managed to have a few hours to spend whiling away the time
and floating down river with an ice cold beer and layer of sun block.

The kids had a good time making fun of me as I dressed
for the occasion: lime green aqua sox and a water logged cowboy hat. Hey
nothing says hillbilly chic like a smashed cowboy hat. Hubby was just as
impressive. His manly physique sported a white with black pinstriped gangster fedora,
white sox and tennis shoes. Of course the younger set wore minimal bikinis and flip
flops.  As the kids had done this before,
they should have known better than to wear flip flops as Boy told the girls that
he would not go fetch them floating away a third time. Instead, they wore the
shoes on their hands and used them like paddles for the remainder of the

At one point in time, we came upon a dumb teenager
screaming to all of his friends, “Hey ya’ll don’t come over here! There’s
snakes!” Yes, he proceeded to go over there and check it out anyway. He is a
dumb teenager after all. But when we looked over at the river’s edge we saw a
young man holding a large rifle and staring at the water. I think we heard
banjo music. We paddled more quickly.

The water was pretty low and therefore the “rapids” were
more like jagged rocks knocking us off our inner tubes and causing an unnecessary
amount of alcohol abuse. Yes, there was some minor bruising and a few ankle
injuries as well, but nothing says fun like a few battle scars.

By the time we got to the end of our adventure, the young
man with the rifle (Anthony) was waiting for us on the shoreline. Apparently,
he had taken quite a shine to my bikini clad Sari and just had to get a few
words in while he had the chance. Although we all made fun of his very thick
southern accent and Deliverance-esque surroundings, Boy mentioned he’d trade
places with Anthony any day. “Sitting outside, hanging down by the river
watching young women float on by wearing little to nothing and graciously
helping them out of the water. Not a bad job. Bet he’s gets a lot of action!”

Guess I would never have thought of it like that. That’s why;
when you have the opportunity to randomly spend a Tuesday afternoon floating
down a river with your kids, jump on it!

Tags: Adventures

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